I slept for more than 2 hours for the first time this whole year. No I’m not joking. I haven’t truly slept in 3 months.

Slept only 2 hours again… When will the nightmare end? My whole head is killing me because of clenching my jaw due to pain. This is bullshit, my physio was useless and now I’m trapped in this pain forever.

I wish I could sleep. Everyone gets to sleep except me. I wish literally my own breathing didn’t keep me up. I envy people who can sleep in noisy environments. I’m just so tired.

I tried having the computer turn off after 2 hours so that the bright screen isn’t on the entire time I’m sleeping, but… Didn’t work. Nightmares. Lucid dreaming. Shapes in the dark, sneering faces, motion just out of sight. A banging on the door that isn’t real it’s just a phantom but I could swear it was real enough to wake me up. I know why I’m like this. Doesn’t make it easier, but it does allow me, once I’ve calmed down and the tightness in my chest has ceased and I can think with a clear head, to rationlize everything and feel less afraid.

On goes the night light

Lebnen on my mind , so I did some sewing

7alet ta2ahhob 2oswa يصلي كرمال لبنان

Me: I’m gonna go to bed early.

Me, for the next three hours:

I never realized how important sleep is till I’m fighting and struggling against it and begging at the door for it to come… I feel good about life, I’m even functional again but I just can’t get a normal fucking sleep schedule, and it’s ruining everything. I genuinely want to cry. Fucking choke me till I pass out at this point.

Trying to train myself to sleep on my back bc my comfort position is sleeping flat on my belly.

“Can you breathe?” That’s not the problem.

The problem is I sleep with my closed fist under my face, particularly my eye. And I’ve been waking up for weeks unable to see out of the eye was leaning on for several minutes. I’m afraid of permanently damaging my eyes because the only way my body will sleep for 3 hours uninterrupted is with my fist pressed into my corneas.

yall know that glitch where youre in bed at night after a long day, and you’re so tired that it feels like you could fall asleep at any moment, but then you turn the lights off and actually try to sleep but you literally just can’t? Yeah, it sucks. They should really fix that in the next update.

my ass could not sleep tonight and that’s with the white noise I got. I think it’s anxiety or something. I had planned to get up early and I guess my body is just looking out for me?

My latest blog debunks common sleep myths that might actually be keeping you awake and shows you how to get better rest the right way.

Check it out here: https://www.volitiontherapy.co.uk/post/sleep-myths-that-might-be-sabotaging-your-rest

Slept 2 hours: completely functional human being, ready to kick ass, just a couple of yawns throughout the day

Slept 8 hours: please kill me so I can sleep more I beg you

Slept 12 hours: either functionally dead or better than I ever was

I think my brain hates me? Four episodes of sleep paralysis in one night, all of which were paired with fucked hallucinations. I only slept for a little over three hours and I didn’t know it was even possible for it to happen that frequently in such a short period of time.

I tried to sleepover with my baby sister on the couch today but she ended up falling asleep first and i was trying to remember 2 of the 3 weird dreams i had this week, and when I tried going to sleep I turned on the lights on accident and my sister somewhat moved so I tried quickly turning them off, but by then I think she had already woken up and then I failed to soothe her and she went over to sleep at our mom’s room, which will possibly bother her in the morning, but anyway, I tried going to sleep but the TV was on that mode where the TV icon just bounces around in the screen and having that little bit of light periodically flash my eyes was enough to annoy me and keep me awake, so I did what any reasonable person would do and turned off the TV, then I went back to the couch and tried sleeping again, didn’t work, I tried a punch a positions, tried doing something with the cushions, all to somehow make myself sleep, so instead I tried doomscrooling on Instagram bc what else do you do when you can’t sleep? You do something that reportedly worsens the likelihood of you sleeping, and then my step-dad (who my mom kinda broke up with but also kinda didn’t bc reasons) just randomly showed up at exactly 23:58 and I remember he said he’d come to talk with my mother about their relationship at Saturday, which, by now, technically is, I just didn’t expect him to be so punctual as to arrive 2 minutes before the day even started, but regardless, I thought they would start arguing or maybe drop my sister back with me so they could do whatever couples do when they have problems or smt, so I tried sleeping again, I heard nothing going on and my sister wasn’t brought back so I tried sleeping again, and once again, it didn’t work, so I went back to doomscrooling and for some reason Instagram just decided that after midnight my algorithm has to spam me with emotional wrecking videos but mostly just a lot of disturbing content about the Epstein Files and the whole case and stuff and specially focus on how it’s victims and reporters suffered, are suffering or are in serious danger, this obviously doesn’t help me sleep, so I hop onto YouTube to have some non-ai happy dopamine slop poured onto my eyes, it kinda helps me calm down, I watch some other things to cheer me up then try going to sleep again, and wouldn’t you know, I still can’t sleep, now I was just sitting there, looking at the ceiling and ugly crying about feeling overwhelmed over nothing in specific until I remember I haven’t got my period yet, and according to my period tracker my period is due TODAY, what a coincidence, I did not want to face the idea of potentially traumatizing myself once again for watching stuff that is clearly too much for me but I also don’t want to unpack my own emotional turmoil that might have caused this whole sittuation, is 5 am and I have some kind of religious event to go along with my mom and sister which will supposedly start at 8 am and end around 4 pm, and I KNOW that if I do sleep, I will not sleep enough and I will be a grumpy bitch the whole day which I will feel even worse about, so now I have so seriously decide whether I should drink coffee and get through the day as a barely functioning human being or take my meds and possibly spend my day fighting the urge to sleep while my brain short circuits or if I take both options and become a considerably functional crashout.

Whatever i pick, if anyone asks, I’ll just say I’m in “that time of the month” and hope everyone leaves it at that

Does anyone have any advice on how to fix a totally fucked up sleep schedule l? Because mine is completely broken. I did not sleep at all last night, then passed out at around ten a.m. (I think) and woke up around 4 p.m. I don’t know how I’m supposed to recover from this.

Blog 9: Tired

I honestly don’t wanna write this but I have to, so you know how there’s times when you barely get enough sleep in the night you end up being sleepy at school in the morning? Well, not that I experience it much but it’s also saddening its happened to me during Monday.

It’s not like I’m intentionally trying to destroy my body by getting less than the required sleep, it’s just that my body clock is so off by the usual hour I cannot get sleepy until I’m only a few hours away from waking up, worse my naps (which unfortunately happens in the late afternoon) pushes my body clock even more to almost midnight, making it difficult to get asleep earlier than that. It’s just frustrating how I can’t get a proper sleep for more than 4 hours without getting cut off by my school and/or pushed by my nap time. It’s a negative feedback loop really, sleep late > wake up early > get tired at home and take a nap >I’ll sleepy later > repeat.

Do you have any tips to fix this? I don’t wanna lose more precious sleep time. Let me know in the reblogs

Biograft in your code, out of your code </3

my wishes to everyone who deals with sleep paralysis . seeing these episodes from an outside perspective is absolutely horrifying

Went from never sleeping to needing 10 hours of sleep to function okay and still be functioning by the time I’m back home like ok ig

I hate sleeping alone because 98.9% of the time I have sleep paralysis episodes.

I feel like someone is inside my house and I can’t move, open my eyes, scream. I am unable to live on my own and that terrifies me, because i feel that eventually i will be completely alone.

Fuck now I’m dizzy I think it might be time to sleep