Thank you.

“The near enemy of love is attachment. Attachment masquerades as love. It says, ‘I will love this person (because I need something from them).’ Or, ‘I’ll love you if you’ll love me back. I’ll love you, but only if you will be the way I want.’ This isn’t love at all – it is attachment – and attachment is rigid, it is very different from love.” — Jack Kornfield

More on this topic here → Was It Love or Something Else?

my biggest red flag? i would always choose Landa over Aldo

my toxic trait is i want to find out what it feels like to be somebody’s 1st choice

If u think cats hate everyone ur wrong. they just hate YOU

Red Flag Alert - Anti-Trans Genocide in the USA - #3 | Lemkin Institute

Red Flag Alert - Anti-Trans Genocide in the USA - #3 | Lemkin Institute https://share.google/FQOouNIPgsNEHNMtN

Red Flag Alert - Anti-Trans Genocide in the USA - #3 | Lemkin Institute

🧡 SOURCE 💚

​NOTE: there is a final slide i didn’t include here due to the 10 images limit 😭 that mentions sending this to people who you think might benefit from seeing it, etc. (source link has that + all that’s pictured here <3)

alsoooo @royalfirefly @gemevieve @suntears1037 @sunpuppycat-art @pbscore uhhh uhhhhhhhHHH & others: i thought this was interesting/informative & maybe you folks will too?

I think we need to bring back tom cardy

Because he makes some really good songs

If you don’t believe me listen to red flags and mixed messages

Storytime: men on the internet (#48392)

Random guy starts chatting with me on here. At first he seems kinda funny. Then I notice he has zero posts, zero reblogs, nothing on his Tumblr. Red flag already. When I ask why he even made an account, he can’t give a normal answer.

Very quickly he starts asking for photos. But mostly he wants to show himself to me. On Snapchat.

I tell him I don’t use Snapchat (for obvious reasons) and that I absolutely do not need to see him. I had also already told him I wasn’t interested from the start.

Does that stop him?
Of course not. This man keeps begging me to make a Snap.

Then, completely unprompted, he sends me a cropped photo of his mouth here in the chat.

Just his mouth.
No context.
Like that was supposed to change my mind.

Anyway, after some more begging I tell him very clearly I’m not interested in continuing the Snapchat conversation.

And guess what happened next?

His account is now deactivated.

So yeah. Why were you even on here in the first place?
Men of the internet:
if a woman says she’s not interested, sending her a mystery mouth picture is not the power move you think it is. 

Disclaimer: Some parts of the chat I didn’t include because they were irrelevant for this story. I’m not gonna post the creepy mouth picture and Snapaccount on here for obvious privacy reasons.

red flag list 🚩

• people with bone-themed names
• pup + edgy word as username
• guy who thinks every tweets about him
• pinterest sanrio or otherwise overly-cutesy pfp, typically hello kitty, my melody, my sweet piano, or an idol game character
• edgy ‘crazy’ character pfp
• username with 'necro’ in it
• 'everyones the issue but me’
• american southerners

not always! but theyre the usual suspects!

Is it weird that I think a guy being attracted to Loona (the wolf, not the Kpop group) is an instant red flag?

I’ve been texting this guy and sexting him. Is it weird for him to get mad at me for not replying to his d!ck video. I watched it (more than once) then left and went to insta. I forgot to respond genuinely. This really pissed him off like bad. He’s mad and mad at me. I told him I’m sorry two or three times and said I should be. I said don’t be mad and he changed the conversation.

It’s a red flag, I have a feeling. I know, I’ve only been talking to him for five days or less now.

I swear

My biggest horrific toxic trait is identifying with Cheng dieyi and I’m absolutely not proud of that, in fact, I’m deeply ashamed.

Red flags in men (my version-from lived experience)

1. Anger issues: yelling, road rage, inability to control emotions, getting into arguments and fights, break things, punch walls -> even when the anger is not directed at you
2. Emotionally unstable and immature: when you’re in clonflict with them, he would personally attack you and take something away from you
3. Silent treatment, ghosting, stonewalling, ignoring, shutting down
4. Inability to take accountability or apologize
5. Lack of empathy
6. Mommy issues: ask how his mom is like and how his mom raised him
7. Stingy men: have money but decide to not spend it on you
8. Jealous and insecure men: commentary on appearance, social media, anything that will make you or take you down, has issues with men looking at you
9. Makes you shrink yourself
10. Communication that disappears, shutting down their emotions and dismiss your emotions
11. Coercive control: isolation, intimidation, controlling spending, gaslighting
12. Calls you names: b word
13. following bunch of half naked girls
14. If his friends are trash and cheating, most likely he would also cheat
15. Ask him what his worst first date, if he blames/demonize the women he is a red flag
16. Ask him what he admires about his mom
17. Does not care about politics or a right wing conservatives
18. Always putting himself first over your needs
19. Refuse to be bad at anything, inability to be a beginner
20. Judging a stranger for how they spend their money
21. Can list ex-partner red flags, but inability to point out their own red flags
22. They can’t stop talking about their ex
23. Makes you feel confused about how he feels about you
24. No small kindness: when they know what makes you smile but never acts on it
25. They make you feel too much: dramatic, needy, oversensitive everytime you express hurt
26. No efforts, no plans, never initiate
27. No reciprocity
28. You feel like you’re the only one bringing up problems
29. Defensive instead of curious when you’re bringing up problems
30. You started to edit yourself and abandon yourself
31. Fight and pretend it didn’t happen
32. They minimise what matters to you

Pulling your energy out of you

…… it’s not always about yelling or fighting …. its about gaslighting

Its about telling half truths

Its about not wanting to understand you… or communicate with you.

I need to stop ignoring the red flags… red means to stop

I’m such a red flag everybody that the character I love loves died and I’m fucking cackling over here nobody should be allowed to love me

Have you ever tried to get an apology from someone who’s clearly wrong, only to end up doubting yourself?

It’s not just stubbornness, it’s a red flag screaming fragile ego. Deflection, gaslighting, blame-shifting… it erodes trust FAST.

Curated insights on why they can’t say ‘sorry’ and how to protect your peace. Who’s dealt with this?

Full read: Red Flags in Relationships

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