So I (23 F) and my roommate (25 F) have not been able to agree on cleaning habits and I’m frankly getting a bit fed up. I work from home most days and usually only have to go to the office 1-2 half days and she works full 40 hours (sometimes overtime) in person with an extra 40ish minute commute. At first trying to get her to do anything around the house was like pulling teeth, she would come straight home, lock herself in her room, and only come out to cook a messy dinner then go back to her room, not washing her dishes or wiping the counter. She would also lock her incontinent cat out of her room and that cat LOVED to lay on the kitchen table and basically urinate all over it. I would be the main one hanging out in the living room for a while, so she said everything outside of her room was my responsibility, but I can’t even stand to be in there because of the urine smell because the couch is soaked in it and I can’t get it out no matter what cleaners I use, and the few times she would wash dishes there would still be a ton of food and grease on them.

So I decided to clean up everything myself, took her word for it. She’s tired, and it’s worse on me to try to get her to clean anything than it is to just do it myself. So that’s fine, I did it without complaint. That started last week. Last night she came out of her room to do laundry and noticed me cleaning up her dinner mess and she just started screaming at me???? “Am I not cleaning good enough for you? Are my standards not good enough for you?” Calling me OCD and a neat freak and a horrible friend. I tried to explain the cat piss being unsanitary and food crumbs risking attracting bugs and I’d like to make my own dinner on a clean surface and she just threw her clothes on the floor and stormed back to her room. She was screaming angrily on a call for hours, idk to who. Now I’ve got mutual friends calling me a butch and saying I shouldn’t leave my room or that AI need serious mental health help for my OCD that I don’t think I even have, because I don’t think eating on a cat piss sticky surface with old crumbs and sauces is really considered OCD. I know she’s got mental health problems that make her feel immensely guilty and then lash out angrily, but it’s never been like this before in the year we were friends before moving in together. I can’t leave the lease because we’re only 4 months into a year lease and its hard to find another place if you’ve got a broken lease on your record, so I’m here for another 8 months.

I havent yelled or insulted or anything, and that’s been most of her interactions towards me since after about a month of living together and its really starting to wear down on my own mental health.

AITA?

AITA

I cut out my oldest friend because he refuse to turn vegan. I keep trying to explain to him that meat it murder. About how cruel the animals are treated and how there are much better alternatives. He says some shit like “I respect your chances but you should respect mine” which is stupid I just can’t with him anymore

Said all this on x and people were devided about it so maybe tumblr has more sense

some days i’m just so drained that i cannot be bothered to make facial expressions anymore

AITA for not responding “sympathetically enough” to my brother’s college application being rejected?

Like, yeah, that sucks

But what am I supposed to do about it?

Give him false comfort and empty reassurances? How the hell is that gonna make anything better?!

Like idk what I’m supposed to do here other than say ‘that sucks bro’?

dying bc my friend is reading sotr and loves it, so i told her we should bring red gumdrops to the theater when the movie comes out and she went “wait why?” i had to backtrack so fast but now she knows something’s up.

Dude

My mother is treating me like I am insane schizophrenic

So like

TW: vent?? , my mom fucking hates me??

Um a hit ago my best friend got taken and rehomed by cps and like also I’ve not been feeling great

And I’ve not been eating breakfast and I would stay in bed late and

Like she said that she’d put me in a strait jacket yesterday last night because I thought she said something and I said that I think I’m going crazy

You know

Because I didn’t catch what she said

And yeah she said that she’s gonna put me in a strait jacket

So um

I am really scared of her now

And today she kept telling me to eat breakfast or she’s going to slap me and take my phone

And I didn’t even do anything wrong

She just..

I don’t know

But why I’m eating less is because like I get really bloated

And food’s been looking less appetizing anyway.. so

But yeah

Um I think she thinks I’m crazy

And i think she’s out to get me

So I am trying to distance myself from her the best I can

But that’s hard because we live in the same house… and she tries to talk to me when I don’t want to or don’t feel like it

Is it normal for your mother to say she loves you and cares about you and then cause you problems and hurt you and scare you and still not acknowledge what she’s done and tell you shit like “you can talk to me” but not fucking listen to you or take you to a professional

I forgot to mention that spine surgery convo only happened cause I brought it up and talked about it before break. I still feel sorry for what I said and I will never say anything like that ever again. I genuinely wouldn’t be so upset if I didn’t see her give men multiple chances and the one time I mess I get ghosted. I just feel disrespected cause why did they lie and not tell me that they don’t wanna be friends. I feel played

Welcome to Judge Maddy’s Blog!!

Hello everyone! This is a space for sharing stories, getting advice, and seeing what the internet thinks—kind of like a mix of “Am I the Asshole?” but with your personal twist.

Have something on your mind? A weird situation at work, a funny family drama, or a dilemma you just can’t figure out? Send me your story—anonymous or not—and I’ll post a survey for the community to weigh in. Other users can chime in with their thoughts, advice, or just a little moral support in the comments.

No judgment here—just curiosity, empathy, and a dash of fun. Think of it as your story’s safe little stage, where you get to see how the world would react.

So, what’s your story?

i have no sporting spirit whatsoever cause i just felt bad that they will need to go to munich and still play another game

one of my friends changed their nickname in a groupchat that i share with them to something sexual. i let them know that i’m uncomfortable with nicknames that reference sexual things because i’m not comfortable around sexual things in general, and unlike a conversation involving sexual topics (where i can just mute the groupchat and avoid it until it’s done), there isn’t really a way to avoid their nickname while still talking to them in the groupchat.

but one of my other friends called me controlling for asking them to change it because it isn’t my nickname, and said that i can’t control what people joke about (which is true! i’m not asking them to never make sex jokes ever, and i’m not even asking them to stop making sex jokes around me. i only asked for them not to make peoples’ nicknames a sex joke in the group chat i share with them.)

i looked up an article on controlling behaviors and read another few articles about healthy boundaries, and decided that although i am controlling in some aspects of my life (mainly task-based- i struggle to trust that other people will complete a task i care about the “correct” way), i believe i’m completely reasonable to ask that my friends don’t use their group chat nicknames to reference sex, because one of the categories for healthy boundaries is asking people to avoid certain topics of conversation around me.

but, i’m not really sure. maybe it is unreasonable and controlling, since it’s not my nickname?

aita?

I know this isn’t redit but am I the asshole for blocking my friends and deleting their numbers.?

I have two friends let’s call them uhhh, R and Z

We have been friends for a little while about three months now but I have felt them slipping away

R hardly talks to me an when we do talk she’s dismissive and rude. I talk more with Z but it feels like she only talks to me because she has to as my “friend”

I’ve always been blunt facing my problems head on, so I noticed right away when they started acting like I was a stranger again. It honestly hurt.

I don’t make friends often, I have major social anxiety when talking irl and its really rare for people to talk to ME! I’m offen really lonely (that’s why I’m terminally online)

I tried to talk about it, to bring it up. But they just deny it. Its taking a toll on me mentally and Im not going to change to meet standards I never set

Maybe it’s just my anxiety, maybe it’s my 6th sense but I just need someone to tell me I’m not a asshole for cutting them off.

It’s always “oh I’m so sorry you had to suffer this from your mom” until I tell you that I hit her once after years of abuse. Suddenly I’m the worst son.

Is it the avoidant attachment style in me that doesn’t understand being “missed” when you don’t know me, or am I just broken and a little jaded?

I’m a college student (21F) and recently my friend (20f) constantly complains about being broke. The thing is, she’s not. she has no job and her parents pay her rent, tuition, phone bill, car and insurance, and she gets 500 a month for food. But for some reason she will beg for my leftovers and try to get my roommates and I to owe her money, when she knows we don’t have much in comparison because “she’s broke”. Anytime my roommate and I point out how privileged she is, she gets upset. She does drive our friend group around, but she insists on doing so, we are more than fine walking and taking the bus too. She says that she’s saving the money she gets incase of an emergency… but she gets 500 a month (and i know she has a lot more in savings). Also we tell her if she budgeted correctly she would have more than enough to save up which is also an offense to her. In some ways it feels like she feels entitled to our food because she drives even though she knows we can barely afford food for ourselves. I also feel very icked or annoyed when she says “Im gonna be a fatass (then proceeds to ask for our food or leftovers)” and I don’t wanna feel that way about my friend.

Apparently telling somebody that ‘making a cult’ is a horrible idea, and that you should never use the term cult lightly, makes me the bad guy? I’m a killjoy?

So, you completely ignore the victim’s of horrifying abuse, say 'history lies’ and claim that being a minor gives them leniency? Furst the nazi bullshit then this?

Same guy who owns a server full of younger minors and talked sexually in front of them and had to be told to stop? Same guy that allowed the server members to send me graphic sexual content because I called the owners out about their behavior? Used their trauma as a way to guilttrip me for telling them their age isn’t an excuse?

You know I’m not stupid right? I actually know a thing or two about shit.

These people make me sick.

I’ve always hold resentment for my dad cause of how verbally abusive he was too me  when I was a kid and I’m still living with my parents cause my mom says I can’t live anywhere else cause of ky autism cause I’m not independent enough I don’t understand financiers and I don’t have a job but that I haven’t proven myself to do that so I lived with them as the resentment over that abuse grew and he seemed to mellow out so I have to forgive him right cause he’s better now and he loves me as my mom keeps saying and she says everyone resents their parents she resents her but still loves them and 

I’ve been reading things lately usually queer stories very good ones and cause of my autism I need to focous on the story and I want the right voices in my head but I don’t want my dads voice in my head also he voted for trump and who doesn’t see we’re living in a dictatorship so I ask him to be please be quite when I read I have sensitive hearing I can hear far away so I get noise canceling headphones only work best when I put in ear plugs but I get paranoid and so I remind him please be quite can you stay in your room while I read

I’m on the laptop cause they are Webtoons and only available there so I use my laptop I’m not trying to be controlling I remind him in texts cause he keep forgetting when I read and I just don’t want that voice that voice of his in my head when I read that stuff and I need specific voices in my head to read and focus on it it was fine till today and look my dead has anger issues cause of his abusive childhood how things where with his mom she just died a week ago we are all sad I try hard not to upset him a week later I’m reading again and I ask him to please not bother me when I read 

I’m done reading I want to watch a movie so I get pie and ice cream the ice cream is hard I told him before all this that I still don’t want to be bothered and deep down I’m still mad at him for voting for trump and I’m mad at my mom for it too and they don’t see the problem with it all with what’s going on  I try to keep that to myself he keeps bothering me and asks if he can help with the ice cream I don’t want his help I tell him no I don’t and I get more frustrated and keep saying please don’t talk to me and he says well you talking to me that’s cause you kept bothering me and won’t listen to leave me alone when I ask and he says well then we should both stop talking but I only talked when he kept bothering me then I say in emphasis please leave me the fuck alone 

I try to say it calmly and slammed the fridge I shouldn’t have done this I know I should have stayed calmer then he says don’t slam the fridge he stayed that in his normal tone at first then he snapped and got more angry at me calling me a horrible person calling me evil saying I’m the problem that I don’t treat him right 

I get hes annoyed by the texting but I told him way before all this when he was annoyed that I don’t say it to control him I just want to read but now hes saying I’m an evil person and I’m dead to him and he wants me out of his life he starts treating me and talking to me like when I was a child he says I’m never nice and saying I wouldn’t understand the difference between good and evil cause of how I act and I tell him I know the difference better then he thinks he tells me I don’t I don’t understand rage at all he gestures to me like he wants to hit me he never hit me as a kid but he made that gesture a lot when I was a kid when I pissed him off

• and I always have this deep seated fear that I’m evil and a horrible person who deserves to die alone so this all hurts he never called me evil before he thinks I’m evil but not trump though he says he doesn’t like the guy even though years ago he said he did that he admired him I remember that but he calls me evil saying im dead to him and that he wants me out of his life I get he’s going through something but I can’t live with them anymore with all this resentment it’s not healthy it toxic and I don’t want to be a horrible evil person am I evil am I horrible person am I truly the only problem here am I toxic person am I problem at all is anything I’m doing evil or horrible 
• I want out of here but my mom says I can’t live anywhere but here keeps saying he loves me if I keep living here I will lose it each day I’m losing it I want to heal from all that but I can’t by living in the sane house with him every day for the rest of my life but my mom always says stuff that I have to or other shit like that and now he says he’s sorry but how do you expect me to get over it he says o don’t have to forgive him but he’s sorry and he now feels bad seriously seriously and you keep bothering me too 
• tell me what to do I can’t trust anyone at home I can’t trust myself I don’t feel safe

unpopular opinion: too many things are becoming normalized and when u point this out people think u are closed-minded and don’t understand anything

I had a moment when I went out for soda with my spouse. It’s kind of like a date. We play cards, share a soda, and chat. I’ve been going to the same restaurant for over a year. The staff mostly know me and my husband. When I say I tasted mold in the soda…

I am very sensitive to smell and taste. I was a cook for multiple years, and I have been flooded multiple times in my life. I was in an apartment that had moldy window sills. I know the smell and taste of mold.

So I go up to someone I had never really met before and told them about this conundrum. I asked if they had washed all the pieces to the machine lately. They reply that they had been cleaned the night before. I suggest that maybe the syrup bag got punctured or something. I tasted mold! They did nothing. I can say that for sure because I sat playing cards with my spouse for over an hour. No one went to check or to tell me that something had been done.

It made me mad, because they were not busy at all. It was that weird moment of 3:00 p.m. and if I recall there were about two other people in the restaurant.

What the lady behind the counter did do was get me something from the other soda machine. One sip and it was night and day. Did they taste it? No. Was the manager told about this? No. It makes me want to never go there again.

Is it because I’m a person of action that this bothers me so?

It bothers me when my own spouse isn’t full of action. I grew up in a home where one parent worked in the ER. I was taught urgency and purpose in movement. I have to say it’s one of the reasons why I made a decent cook. I am not going to stand by when something bad happens. I will not be the one who is silent or still.

Just because one employee was too lazy they could have poisoned people. And honestly they probably did.

To willingly hurt the masses, because of your laziness is beyond my comprehension!

I can’t wait till I go back and see the manager. I want her to know about this old lady not doing a proper job. So am I the asshole?