there is something deeply sad about knowing you will never love someone as much as they love you

i know he loves me, but i can’t love him the way he deserves and yet, every month for a week straight, he finds his way back into my dreams

today is my birthday and also my last day on earth,,,,,, attempting tonight, never posted much here but whatever……. insert blink

tell my bf i love him @D34dlycupid

My bday is innnn… 12 days!! :D

excited >u<.

I MISS MY MUSICAL GROUP…. I WISH IT WASN’T OVER NOW I HAVE I HAVE TO WAIT FOR A YEAR….😔

I’M SO FUCKING EXCITED A GAME I’VE BEEN WAITING FORON ROBLOX IS DOING 48 HOUR TESTING OH MY GODO

guys im about to take the SAT

wish me luck please im freaking out

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

My job is so soul-destroyingly horrible in a way that’s so british. Mfs will twist any situation so delusionally so that the status quo and power dynamics remain, like the material results are so far secondary to this mind-games shit it’s insane. Even americans at least will focus on material results or social cohesion, and it’s possible to be liked or respected even if you’re a Disrupter of some kind as long as you’re charismatic and/or get results. This is a nasty small-minded crab-bucket country of bullies.

im hungry and theres nothing good to eat

Also just. The lack of seeing children as people is infuriating. “Does he count?” Yes he is a living human being. “But she’s in a stroller / wagon / cart-“ I see that she is still a human person. “He’s only one!” Thats so cool, brand new but still a human person that is a human a person a reaaaaal person they are not your property that is a living beingggggggg

MY FORTUNE COOKIE HAS NO FREAKING FORTUNE

I’M SO PISSED OFF RN, I’VE LOOKED 𝘌𝘝𝘌𝘙𝘠𝘞𝘏𝘌𝘙𝘌 INSIDE THIS DAMN COOKIE. I’VE CRACKED THE COOKIE OPEN, I’VE LOOKED INSIDE THE COOKIE, I’VE OPENED IT EVEN MORE.

𝘕𝘖𝘛𝘏𝘐𝘕𝘎
AAAAAAAHSHSHDJSJZJSHUAUWJSHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABSHSHAHABAHAHSHSJSJJSJSJNS

New Liberator chapter tonight! Part 1 of the epilogue :’)

Next week will be the last update…

OWOW FUCK

IM SO FUCKING DONE IM AT MY LIMIT ISTG SOMETHING IS ALWAYS HAPPENING WHETHER IM ANXIOUS AND DEPRESSED AND I HATE MYSELF OR IM SO EGOTISTICAL AND EXPLOSIVE IT HURTS THE PEOPLE AROUND ME OR IM BEING TARGETED BY THE PEOPLE I USED TO TRUST AND NOT BEING ABLE TO TRUST ANYONE OR BEING OBSESSED OR OR OR OR WTF MIGHT HAPPEN NOW JUST DIE JUST KILL ME JUST KILL EVERYONE I WANT EVERYTHING TO EXPLODE FUCK FUCK FUCK MY LIFE I WISH I WASNT BORN IM GOING INSANE ATP JUST LET ME HAVE A MOMENT OF PEACE IM TRYING TO BALANCE BEING MENTALLY ILL WITH IDENTITY ISSUES AND REALITY ISSUES AND BEING SCARED OF EVERYONE AND HATING MY FAMILY AND PENT-UP ANGER AND BEING TRAPPED AND NOW THIS SHIT WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING ANYMORE BECAUSE I DONT EVEN KNOW !!!!!! AND PROBABLY NOTHING WILL HAPPEN BECAYSE NOTHING EVER DOES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

book 16 spoilers

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE QUEENS ARE GONE? Why kinkajou??? WHY THE EGG??? I HZVE SO MANY QUESTIONS BUT I PUT THEM IN THE AUDIBLE REVIEW

I also love Umberry but it’s rly rushed

it literally cannot be this boring. its only tuesday. it is literally tuesdayyyyyyyyyy

im tired kinda wanna die i cleaned my keyboard and added o-rings so it wouldnt be so clacky (its still so clacky (its a mechanical keyboard) uh

yeah. and now im. out of breath. from walking… Down… the stairs. which is good and excellent and normal.

also my knees just get so fucked up when i sit at my desk on account of I Dont Sit Right aka i need pressure on my feet and/or legs which ends up meaning that im sitting on my feet or legs which. is. bad for my back and for my ankles and also my knees. my kneeeeees. fuck.

how am i supposed to sit in a chair. all day. do people really stay upright, like, all day? all day???? are you sure????

im calling myself lazy in my head but im also agknowleging that im. fucking. disabled. im a disabled individual. with. disabilities. several of them. so why am i still trying to be quote unquote normal. aka able bodied. im literally. not.

SSOOOOOOO MUUUCHH KENJITOSSHIIIIIIII

NO NO NO EVERYONE FELL ASLEEP AT THE SAMW TIME AG AIN NI HES GONNA FUCKIGN GET ME HEELPPPPPP MICHAEL DONG FUCKING LEAVE ME HERE

The absolute *audacity* of some people

CW: Gambling relapse

A: So while the others are not able to front as strongly because of a stressful visit, and i am a recovering addict, Noddy is going to kill me when she can front, but i turned 100 dollars into 400 only to lose it all because i was dragged into a casino x.x i feel like i am a failure because i didnt stop while i was ahead. i had amazing luck on slot machines, i kept switching machines when i felt my luck going bad. its a vibe thing.

Anyways i am probably hitting a gambling low with it. i feel like curling up and crying so im gonna do that.