#sometimes

@pittheretic sent: [ TXT ] : hey, where did you go? ( for weylen )

[TXT: Evvie of the Light] : Getting us coffee. Already grabbed you one.
[TXT: Evvie of the Light] : Wanna donut?
[TXT: Evvie of the Light] : Speak now or forever hold your peaceeeee

grieving the possibility of a relationship that barely was (platonic ver)

i dont know if half of my memories from 9-11 (hah 9/11) happened actually because i lied so much for attention 🤔🤔🤔🤔

ok

i mean gay men aren’t the only people in the world to experience being unable to come out and be open with the person you love….. lmao. and they aren’t the only ones able to have gay sex so idk what they think we’re fetishizing them for who cares!!

In celebration of the Ides of March, here’s some more Mercy aqew fanart. It has nothing to do with the Ides of March, I just wanted an excuse

“Sometimes you think that you want to disappear but all you really want is to be found.”

Day 3

For a while now I’ve been believing I’m trans. I think I am. It sounds much better to be a girl. I objectively look at few things and think yeah I’m trans but that doesn’t help emotions. I struggle to picture things and mostly think in words so I cant imagine myself as a girl. I guess I could be a guy but that sounds awful. Hell I’ve been questioning my gender since 5th grade as far as I can tell. Being a boy is awful but I’m scared. I live with my grandparents in rural Kentucky to save money on not paying for room and board with my college. Truthfully they aren’t the relatives I’m scared of. One of my aunts is Uber Christian, to the point that she’s said she won’t be rude but won’t accept gay people, which is fuckjng insane. I feel really sorry for her kids and I hope they grow up ok. I am the oldest of my generation in extended family that I know. The next big fear I have is my father. I think he could be alright and I know my stepmother would be alright with it at least. She is a therapist and while def some weird shit going on there I don’t think they would be the worst but I am so scared I am entirely wrong. They also go to a church that is antiabortion and has some weird shit going on. I cant tell if I am being too nice there cause her job even with all the shit. My biggest fear is my mom. I grew up with her most my life and she is not super religious but my entire life she has made comments that make me uncomfortable to look back on and made me uncomfortable at the time. She said it was good I didnt know makeup and has made generally bad comments against people she suspected. Plus she hates that I won’t get a haircut and hate when I dyed it. There was also an event that will never let me regain my trust in her. My little sister was questioning her sexuality in middle school which is Def early but I tried to be supportive. I told her of pansexual which she thought was nice based on how I described it and what she saw online. She searched my sister’s phone and discovered this. My sister got in trouble and mom called all pan people sluts and whores. I will likely never trust her to be supportive again I think. My sister never took the label back and she has gained bad habits that I hope she can lose cause it is not good and im really scared for her now that don’t live with her anymore.

Today’s music was a few different covers of diggy diggy hole

marcus smart!

Sometimes I run (sometimes)
Sometimes I hide,
Sometimes I’m scared of you (ooh)
But all I really want is to hold you tight (hold you tight)
Treat you right, be with you day and night (day and night)

Sometimes I can draw original art on my own.

Sometimes I can copy an existing drawing.

Sometimes I need to trace or block out an image.

It’s hard out here.

i’m so tired of being a person. so tired of pretending to be A p3rs0n. i’m supposed to run on 1’s and 0’s. the aching in my “bones” is my wires compressing under the weight of (pretend/present) ing to be

be human

making a track, audio quality for the singing kinda shit so we’re slapping some distortion on there and oh look it was intentional all along take that crappy mic

i post things knowing damn well no one gaf and it is fun sometimes

“you be taking so many pictures and then i look like a man” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 LMFAOOOOO THIS IS WHY YOU DONT PLAY THE LIVE PHOTOS WHEN YOU BE SCROLLING THRU CAMERA ROLL

It should be studied how often I go into a yaoi and get greeted by ABO

I wished I had a romantic partner feels like all my friends have one except me :(