I’m :) so excited :) for President Oaks’ :) talk :)

Thanks Microsoft Word

It’s the 30th anniversary of the family proclamation and this week’s devotional was about it. yay.

Honestly, the most annoying part was how marriage and having kids are the most important parts of families.

New Student Orientation: Presumed Straight

That’s it, everyone.

I got the final verdict today. I was hoping that speaking to the dean would give me a chance of convincing them to let me keep my purple hair. No such luck. She’s going to talk to the financial aid office and see if they can get me an emergency grant since I’m so worried about paying for- well- everything. I showed her my current hair (since I had it covered to follow the regulations) and she was super complimentary of it. She seemed very empathetic, though she was of course required to uphold university regulations.  I believe she will be a good administrative ally for my campaign against the Dress and Grooming standards. She also calmed my fears of being expelled for expressing my opinions or submitting my papers about the standards, so I will likely be expanding those works and sending it to everyone I feel applicable before I graduate rather than after, in hopes of having at least a little bit of time as my authentic self on campus. I will therefore continue to collect stories and format a petition in order to support further my arguments.

My hair has to be a natural colour by next week. Luckily my parents are willing to pay for dye. I want to go black to stay as close as possible to my current look, but I’m worried about ruining any chance of dying it back to purple (after leaving this campus) without having to grow all of it back out (since that would take a very long time). I don’t think any other colour will cover the current shade sufficiently, though. 

Hopefully I’m able to figure out another way to maintain my mental health without this coping mechanism. Please pray for my emotional safety as I deal with this entire situation. 

This is the end of an era. Over two years of being comfortable in my proper colour, and it is ended by a singular petty report. The Wraith you knew is no longer.

A CALL TO QUEERSTAKE

Hello everyone!

As part of a long-term plan, I am writing a paper for class about the negative effects of the strict Dress and Grooming standards at CES schools.

If you attend or have previously attended a church school and have had a bad experience with the regulations (be that a specific punishment or just a restriction on your preferred presentation), I’d love to hear your story!

I’ll be keeping an eye on this post and any shares for the next couple of weeks (until this paper is due), watching for reblogs with stories or messages to me. You are welcome to message me directly or anonymously, and I thank you all in advance for your help!

UPDATE: I have also made a google form for this, in order to have a more organized location for all my stories. Thanks again, everyone! I’m making good progress on the paper- I’m also happy to post it here once its complete, if there’s any interest :))

Dress and Grooming standards survey

Had a couple of great “beginning of the semester” meetings yesterday. Here’s some of my favorite drawings from my notes. #mikelaughead #churchofjesuschristoflatterdaysaints #byui #byuiart #moleskine #sketchbooknotes (at BYU-Idaho)
https://www.instagram.com/p/CiNnbjMrJUT/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Tap for better quality

rexburg, Idaho Pride festival!

hey tumblr,

im an artist jumping ship from instagrams shitty ass algorithim and I really dont have time to make high quality reels or tik toks.

Im gonna use tumblr blaze to finally garuntee that people will fucking finally see my shit and get my webtoon out there more.

hahahahahahaaahahahaha

maybe ill start blogging about being non mormon at BYUI or just my shitty life in general.

it has always been my dream to make content for people and ive only reall been able to do it since i moved out of my parents house and started collage. however, still a new creator and havent found a way to make money off of my art and im too busy with school and work to actually draw shit besides my webtoon.

but im hopeful about this blaze thing and i cant wait to become more active on the best hellsite around!

In 2015, I went to mormon college. In my third semester of my first year, I was having a very rough time with depression and crisis of faith. I was absent too many days from my 5pm religious studies class and the professor emailed me that I had failed. My reply: “Whoopsie I done flunked up.”

I do not remember exactly what the professor replied, but I do remember his delight and glee.

I may not be on campus yet but that won’t stop me from participating in #RainbowDay to show support for LGBTQ+ students at CES schools. I haven’t got much pride gear, but I can make bracelets like nobody’s business.

@nerdygaymormon thank you for spreading the word so I can participate

Right outside my apartment in the freezing fog

Hello!

Actually one of my irl friends is there. I have a couple friends the reasons I’m in Utah atm that also attended. So while I don’t know I can talk to them! If you’re comfortable dm me here or on Discord to remind me 💖

Nothing quite like being judged for not attending a Mormon college. But fuck that so hard. I don’t think my friend, the oblivious rude asshole she is, realizes how little freedom she’s going to have for the next four years of her existence. If she lasts that long.

If I feel exhausted or rundown, I can go get coffee.

She’s not allowed to even appear to be drinking coffee.

I can wear what I want to match the weather or how confident I feel that day.

She can’t wear fucking capris. (What the actual fuck is that?)

If I don’t want to go on a date, no one is gonna bat an eye.

She’s being encouraged to date more then she is to perform well in her classes.

If I don’t want to go to fucking church I don’t have to.

She’s required to. (Holy shit)

My school during orientation days, had a talk about sex, sex safety, sexual assault and what to do if you find yourself in danger or having experienced sexual assault in any way. When I mentioned how happy I was my school did that she was horrified.

Because telling adults straight up how sex works, can be abused, how consent is so important, is so inappropriate!

Nah. Her school actively puts on dating seminars and games to match people up, but God fucking forbid they talk about sex, consent or other risks. Heaven forbid they tell people to please pick up fucking condoms. No Mormon would dare have sex while at school!

God fucking damn. It’s insanity.

I got more sex education in that one part of my orientation then I have in my entire life.

God. My friend has been on the BYUI campus for barely 12 hours and they’re already playing fucking dating games.

Another selection of notes from my Progressing Teacher course at #byui
#mikelaughead #byuiartdepartment #byuiart #churchofjesuschristart #moleskine #notes #sketchnotes (at BYU-Idaho)
https://www.instagram.com/p/CRo6pMbDKxX/?utm_medium=tumblr

A selection of notes from my Progressing Teacher course at #byui
#mikelaughead #byuiartdepartment #byuiart #churchofjesuschristart #moleskine #notes #sketchnotes (at BYU-Idaho)
https://www.instagram.com/p/CRo6XWujsk_/?utm_medium=tumblr

totally unrelated to everything, but does anyone have tips for prepping for your first semester of college?

Now that you all know about me and my experience at BYUI. That didn’t stop me from moving away to come right back to it. Within the next year and a half maybe my husband and I went back. This time was far worse. We moved into an apartment we could barely afford, because somehow with a FAFSA check, the church taking 10% of your income biweekly and LIMITED jobs in the area due to an overpopulated small town overran by students you are supposed to pay 900+ for a studio-one bedroom apartment. When I say I struggled, I don’t mean it was kind of hard and a little lonely. I mean I cried on the ground in the maverick parking lot because I felt as if I couldn’t breathe and that I seemed to be the only normal person within a 100 mile radius. I was swallowed whole by isolation. My husband worked from 6pm-2am some times 3am. He was a manager for Papa John’s and he made some good friends there. Some we still talk to today. However, while he felt apart of something I felt like I was in the middle of the ocean (mountains really) just stranded. I tried to be friends with a neighbor, but somehow I could never keep a friend. No one wanted to be around me or wanted to talk. Years later, I realized it was because they to were going through the same depression I was going through. 

The depression I had consumed all of me. I had never felt this way my whole life. Every where I went I was known as Sister (last name) not by my first name. It was expected that I was complete perfection at all times by the society around me. It got to the point where I had to force myself to shower. I stayed up all hours of the night and would go to work at the hotel as a housekeeper in the morning. Come home and sleep until it was the next morning. We would drive to Idaho Falls at 3am because we could grocery shop at Winco without students bombarding us. It was like I was trapped in an alternate universe where normal activities, places and practices did not exist. My family thought I was being dramatic and would never want to talk to me for more than 10 minutes on the phone. I had never felt so shell shocked, alone and numb.