Sunshine vlog in italy 💜

Lee Know x Gucci’s The God of Love

i am not on tumblr very much these days and since asks apparently only show up in your notifications now? i haven’t actually seen that message, sorry

sure!! im glad you like it an appreciate you asking ✨

“litanies to my heavenly brown body” by mark aguhar 

YOOOOOOOOO

Keith Haring photographed by Janette Beckman in his studio for the Daily News Magazine, 1985.  

Stretching isn’t enough I need to be able to disassemble my body like legos

(flirting with a girl) I’m doing such a good job of holding myself back from stealing traffic cones today

in the club freakin it in a sensitive style

Interlocking Hand Rings // Natalia Fine Jewels

electric stoves aren’t real btw they’re placebo stoves. your food cooks because of the placebo effect

yeah no its just a bunch of LEDs that turn red, it only boils water because you expect the water to boil

The plague doctor covering me in leeches

Just inking out some frustrations.

[ID: a black & white sketched skull in profile. a vertical slice of the sketch has been extracted and shifted upwards, with a mass of pale red leaves and tendrils reaching out of the space it opened up, from inside the top half of the skull. text in the same colour below it says “My brain has weeds” and the watermark says RB. /end ID]

when i say my gender changes to the tune of the bit i mean a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do and if he can’t then god forbid women do anything

Time transfixed via Rene Magritte

dumb ass accidentally painted a train instead of a fire

rene magritte has talent but this is a rookie mistake

oh man that’s wild!! here’s hoping i continue to not hear from his estate lol

and thank you!!

[guy experiencing the first stage of grief voice] damn i got through the five stages of grief pretty quickly 😄

i miss cd drives. how could you just take her pussy away. likes its nothing

the ocean is out there. whales are real

people who call manual labor boring CLEARLY havent considered the advantages of mindlessly operating a vibrating machine for hours every day

JESUS FUCKING CRHIST I FORGOT MY PPE

i think star trek should write an in universe reason why some series don’t have swearing and some do. make it a universal translator glitch or something.

the captain of each ship can turn the swears on or off when they want to

Kirk would have kept the swears on but any ship carrying Dr. Leonard McCoy is required by Starfleet regulations to turn them off

How dare you keep this in the tags @narwhalsarefalling

[Image description: a set of tumblr tags that say “#the tags from op are hilarious #spock gets briefly placed on a ship where the cursing is turned on and it turns out he’s been cursing like a sailor this entire time. #’fascinating’ is the universal translator’s way of making ‘fucking nuts dude’ starship appropriate #turns out when the translator says ‘illogical’ spock is actually saying something more like #‘your asshole and brain are indistinguishable from one another. do you really fucking need me to explain this you illiterate piece of shit’ #i cannot decide which would be funnier: if it turns out all vulcans talk like that actually #or just spock. #star trek #tos.”

Followed by a screencap from Star Trek: The Original Series showing Spock raising an eyebrow, it is captioned in all caps, “Fucking Nuts Dude.”

/end image description]

Never forget what they took from us.

For those asking how it compares today

and also

And no the food hasn’t changed a damned bit.

Shoutout to everyone using receipts as bookmarks you’re providing valuable information to future scholars

hits the bong and immediately becomes aware of the narrative

hits the bong again and looks directly at the camera knowingly

this is how eve got expelled from Eden

I like how bong can mean both penis and that big vertical disk that makes a lot of noise.

that’s dong and gong. bong means neither of those things

This edible (fruit from the tree of knowledge) ain’t doing shit.

I’m naked.

Wait what’s a buildings fire evacuation plan if you aren’t supposed to use the elevator to get down

You go down the stairwell/fire escape. Is that weird?

But what if you have a walker or a wheelchair??

in america at least, in this situation, there isnt one. either your loved ones or the firemen can get you out using the emergency fire escapes or stairs, or you die 

That’s fucking horrific, thank you

“fun” little story:

last summer my friend who is an amazingly talented artist and i were in this super tall building, and she’s in a wheelchair and i’m pushing her around the room. it’s an art exhibit and some of her art was chosen to be showcased there and so it’s all fine and dandy until suddenly an alarm starts going off

a FIRE ALARM

everyone starts running for the stairs and my friend just looks at me with this forlorn look on her face

“i can’t go down the stairs”

but i’m a stubborn bitch “i’ll carry you”

“what about my chair? it’s too expensive for me to be able to get another one if i can’t get this one back”

“i’ll carry that too”

and i did. we went to the stairs (by then most people from our floor were gone) and i lifted her up in a fireman’s carry over my shoulder and then lifted her chair up and used the ridiculous amount of adrenaline that was coursing through my veins to make it down approximately 20 half-flights of stairs until we met some people exiting lower floors, one of which who kindly took the chair. I changed positions so i was holding my friend bridal-style which was, somehow, easier and the person who took her wheelchair (with her permission to handle it of course) accompanied me to the ground floor and then out the doors

basically there is no real protocol for people who can’t use the stairs in an emergency. it’s up to the people with them, if anyone, to help them or the person to somehow make it down the stairs alone, unassisted

thank fuck that it was just a faulty alarm system, because if i was unable to carry her down those stairs and the building was on fucking fire???? then i don’t know what would have happened to her, but i don’t think it would have been very good.

it’s fucking ridiculous and ableist to the absolute max.

I use a cane. When I did a day-long fire safety training at my northeast American university (UMass Amherst), I asked that exact same question: “what am I supposed to do if the fire alarm goes off and I’m in my lab on the twelfth floor?” 

the fire marshal hemmed and hawed for a while and then said to take the elevator- you’re supposed to leave it free for the fire department to use and they want able-bodied people out fast not waiting for elevators. if the fire alarm has just gone off the building probably hasn’t suffered enough structural damage to make using the elevator dangerous, and modern elevator wells are heavily reinforced. many large and high-trafficked buildings on my campus have fire rated elevators that link in with the fire alarm system so they won’t let you off on a floor with a possible fire. 

if the elevator isn’t working, wait in the stairwell and call the fire department to let them know where you are. modern stairwells are also heavily reinforced- it might not be pleasant but modern building code usually requires fire-resistant stairwell doors in office and big residential buildings, also to help firefighters get in and out safely. older buildings’ stairwells may or may not be retrofitted with fire-resistant doors but a stairwell is generally the safest place to wait if you can’t get out. 

what happened to your friend was horrible, and i’m very glad you were there to help her out, but you can absolutely use the elevator to evacuate if it’s not shut down. those don’t-use-the-elevator rules are for abled people.  

This is GOOD TO KNOW. why do they not tell people this??

Okay, firefighter here. If you are not physically able to use the stairs, and the elevator is NOT compromised, use the elevator. But you MUST be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that the elevator is NOT compromised before you get into it, because there is always the chance that once you get into it, you may not exit it. Power could go out. The elevator may actually BE compromised and you just couldn’t tell from where you were until you were in there, and it suddenly shuts down on you. Something else could happen. 

Understand that once you enter the elevator, you could POTENTIALLY be taking your life into your hands there.

It is NOT LIKELY, to be perfectly honest. It’s only in a pretty catastrophic scenario - think the Twin Towers, USA, on September 11th - that the elevators will be compromised and out of service. But there is a NOT ZERO PERCENT CHANCE and you need to understand that and accept it.

As for leaving the elevators free for the firefighters, okay, here’s the deal. Unless your nearest fire station is literally right next door? Your first on scene fire truck is NOT likely to be there on scene and needing that elevator before you get to the ground. It takes us TIME to find the address, gear up, and drive to the building. Then we need to hoof it into where the elevators even ARE, so YOU HAVE TIME to use the elevator to get down to the ground floor… BUT ONLY IF THERE’S NOT A RUSH ON THE ELEVATOR! And THAT is WHY we don’t tell people this shit. That’s WHY we tell people to NEVER USE THE ELEVATOR… because every self-entitled asshole will use it because they don’t feel like walking, and then put YOU in danger by delaying the elevator’s arrival to you.

IF, however, the elevator IS compromised, or you just can’t get it to come for you, or whatever, and you either don’t have anyone with you who has the adrenaline fueled BALLS to be able to toss you over their shoulder and hoof it down the stairs with you - because, let’s face it, that is RARE AS FUCK, then HERE IS WHAT YOU DO:

You call 911 and tell the call taker that you are in the building that has a fire alarm going off, and you are not able to evacuate because of a physical disability, and you tell them what floor you are on, and EXACTLY what stairwell you are waiting at. And the very FIRST thing that the firefighters are going to do once they arrive, if it is, indeed, a REAL emergency, and not a false alarm, is come get your ass and bring you down. Whether that means carrying you down the stairs, or whether that means locking out the elevators so that no one else can override them and coming to get you themselves, they WILL come get you FIRST THING if it is a real event. And if it is a false alarm? You will probably be the first person who is not involved with the building to know, because the call-taker is going to stay on the line with you until you are under someone’s care and out of danger, or until the scene has been sorted out as real or false, and you are out of danger that way.

These are pretty standard operations in the fire service throughout the United States. There may be some minor variations based on specific municipalities, but, for the most part, this is pretty typical: LIFE BEFORE PROPERTY. So, as long as SOMEONE knows where you are - hence why you call 911 - Firefighters will come get you. You are NOT alone, and you have NOT been abandoned. I PROMISE. It’s like, our whole reason for doing the shit we do: to save lives and to break shit. Sometimes, we get lucky enough to do both at the same time.

High rise fires suck ass, and I always hated them. But the very FIRST thing I asked anytime we got one was if we had “any entrapments” - which is what we call anyone who could not self-evacuate for ANY reason. We ain’t leaving you behind. And yes, your friend who doesn’t have the stamina to carry you down can stay with you, too. Because I would never ask that of someone, honestly. 

Also, just a little FYI… MOST fire alarms are false alarms. Not to make anyone complacent or anything, but, yeah. Most of them are either system malfunctions, someone accidentally hit a pull station, or someone burned popcorn in a break room. So don’t let a fire alarm freak you out until you need it to - by smelling or seeing smoke or flames. 

i have had multiple nightmares about this very thing because NOBODY BOTHERS TO ACTUALLY TELL WHEELCHAIR USERS THIS STUFF

every time i see this post it drives me up the wall because im sure the firefighter means well by saying all this, but you’re giving a false impression of emergency services. they are as ableist as anyone else, sometimes more so, and absolutely routinely leave disabled people to die in all kinds of situations. you cannot count on them to come save you and ideally you need to come up with an alternate plan.

Today I introduced my sister to “the problem of Susan” and I had to explain to her that Susan was left out of Narnia cuz she liked boys and lipstick now and without missing a beat she said but what about Peter? Does Peter not like girls? And I knew she was pointing out the inherent misogyny at the center of the “the problem of Susan” but the implications of that question are a source of much hilarity to meeee LMFAO like Does Peter not like girls? Does he like boys? Is he Gay? Is Narnia really just a homo-utopia where Lucy is also a lesbian and Edmund is a bisexual disaster and Susan was kicked out cuz she was too straight??? Can I make CS Lewis turn over in his grave with this new reading?

…I mean they literally were in the closet…

THEY WERE LITERALLY IN THE CLOSET!!!

Reblog to make C.S. Lewis turn over in his grave

TBH, once the nuances were explained to him, I think he’d find it quite funny. 

@shannaraisles

YES.

the influx of pornbots is so funny. we’re out in our little paddleboat like “oh the rats are swarming again. auspices for the new year.” and in the background the S.S. Twitter is floating past upside down.

crying and sobbing as i use my oar to push all these beautiful sirens back into the water, for i know that they deceive.

Not what that means

Outside the organic milk factory in 2025: